Jesus sets out on his journey to Jerusalem, he appears to know that the fate that awaits him will be awful. There are moments when he seems to shrink from the horror to come. "Abba, Father, all things are possible to you," he prays. "Take this cup away from me, but not what I will but what you will."

At other times, Jesus seems to try and prepare his followers for what is to come, so that they will see that it is part of God's plan. "All of you will have your faith shaken," he says. "For it is written: I will strike the shepherd, and the sheep will be dispersed. But after I have been raised up, I shall go before you to Galilee."

We know that God does not take "the cup" of suffering away from Jesus, and that in spite of his warnings the disciples do indeed lose hope and scatter when Jesus is killed. Jesus tries to tell them that his death is necessary and is not the end of his story, but an unthinkably wonderful beginning.

As I reflect on the Passion narrative this year, I find myself thinking of the difficult realities many of us know lie ahead in our own lives. Most of us have been touched, directly or indirectly, by unprecedented pain and suffering in the form of lost jobs, lost homes, lost savings. We know that the journey is not over. If you're like me, you've asked for God to take this "cup" away many times. I don't want to experience any more hardship.

I also find myself relating to the attitude of the disciples --- they may hear Jesus' warnings about his fate, but they don't seem to really pay attention. Later, when the pain of their loss is most acute, they will search their memories for clues that might help them overcome their fear and sadness. Ultimately, they find that they are able to experience Jesus in a new and powerful way, and spend the rest of their days trying to understand and articulate this experience.

Perhaps there is a message here for us as we experience our own fear and pain. Perhaps the financial upheaval we are experiencing is part of a new beginning, an open door that we would never have seen or chosen on our own. I'd certainly like to think so. If so, a challenge we can embrace is to look for how God might be at work through this crisis.

Jesus told his followers where he was going before he left. While many commentators have suggested that our economic crisis might be a chance to reorient our culture around values of service and justice, this is not a new direction for followers of Jesus. He has been calling us to serve others all along. While you and I may be needier than we have ever been, we can still share the love and compassion that we have in Christ with others.

Bill Peatman writes from Napa. He may be reached at bptidings@yahoo.com.